I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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