White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
Randomize