That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
there was a trapeze. enough said
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
