I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
