"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
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