Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
Randomize
