Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
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