Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
