i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
