Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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