do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize
