He uses pillows to masturbate.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize