how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
