so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Randomize
