Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
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