I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
