I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
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