I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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