where does the pee come out of this thing
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Randomize
