Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
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