I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
You've changed since you got that strap on
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize