Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
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