Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
