Fine. I'll sleep in my office
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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