Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize