I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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