So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
