You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Holy shit dude........stairs
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
