just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize
