She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
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