I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Randomize
