They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize