When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
