Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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