Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Randomize
