I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize
