my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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