he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
