Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
