Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
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