I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
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