a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
Randomize
