the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Randomize
