Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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