he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
