You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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