Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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