so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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