i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
