how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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