the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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