So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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